Mother

Mother’s Day is right around the corner and with the recent death in my family it has me thinking about my life with my own mother. She is a remarkable woman to say the least. I’m sure though most will have the same thoughts about their own mother. Especially if you can relate to my life with mom.

I was born in Fiji and moved here to Canada with my mother when I was just a year and a half old. We stayed with family for nearly a year before we moved into a small little basement suite of our own. My dad? He stayed back in Fiji so it was just me and mom for a good portion of my childhood. She raised me alone with the occasional help from family. Mainly my maternal grandfather and one of my uncles. That’s not to say the rest of my overly huge family didn’t help where they could. I spent a lot of time with them too. My summers were packed with staying with one aunt and uncle or another. I grew up having a close bond and relationship with my cousins and I am thankful for that.

Getting back to me and mom though. Like I said, she raised me alone. She worked part time as a chambermaid at a motel and we were on welfare for a while too. I never lacked for anything. Even if it meant having to wait for that favorite Barbie I did. She taught me a lot growing up. Patience, virtue, morals, love, compassion, empathy, and the list goes on. She was one tough lady though and didn’t take crap. If I screwed up, you bet I paid the price. None of this so called discipline that kids can get away with now. I was spanked, plenty of times. I think I turned out ok. She taught me how to clean, how to do laundry, how to iron. She taught me a lot of valuable life lessons that I am so very grateful for now.

She did suffer a lot though. One, she was so far away from the man she loved. That is a whole different story on its own and not one I will explain at this time. Needless to say, it was hard on her. She had to sit back at times and watch my grandfather drown in one bottle or another. She quit school when she was only eleven years old because her mother died and she had to stay home to care for her father and brother. Everyone else were all married with families of their own by then so she was the only one to do so. With my grandfather working hard all day and most nights coming home drunk, and my uncle studying hard in school and being active in Scouts she was needed at home to cook and clean, and generally manage the house. Such a young age right? This is what my mom did. She struggled all her life to get somewhere and even though she is not a doctor or lawyer, or anyone that makes that kind of money she is rich in other ways.

I admire my mother, even today. We may have our problems, and we may have our little arguments every now and then, but my love for her has never changed. She is one of the strongest women I know and I remember all the things we went through, her and I. Pancake dinners, or something just as simple because we didn’t have a lot of food. She would go without so I didn’t have to. She always put my needs first before her own. Walking knee deep in snow with her then her picking me up and carrying me part way home because busses weren’t running due to heavy snow fall. So many amazing memories! She made so many sacrifices her entire life and none of which I will ever forget. It is because of the strength she has that I was able to get by being a single parent myself for a time before my husband walked into my life. It’s definitely not easy being a single parent and I have a lot of love and admiration for all them.

I know one day I will have to say goodbye to her in a sense. I’ve always believed that when a person passes it is their shell that is buried, or cremated, but their spirit lives on. I find comfort in knowing that, but I am going to miss her hugs and the conversations we’ve had about our life together, or my future, or the children, or her past. I won’t be able to pick up the phone and just say hello. My mother is my everything. She is my rock and one of my biggest supporters. I will be lost without her, I know I will be.

So if you’re reading this, take the time out to tell your mom you love her often, thank her for all she did for you, or still does for you. Time is so short, you never know what tomorrow will bring. Even if your mom is already with her maker, she can still hear you, so please still talk to her. I am very glad and very lucky to have been blessed with a mom like mine.

Thank you mom for everything and Happy Mother’s Day.

I love you.

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